Chapter 28
Eloise Wins the School Board Race!
Tuesday, November 7, 2022, Election Day across America, and we’re in Norman, Oklahoma, staying with a guy who said he gave up on voting after the Nixon re-election in 1972. Said he didn’t know any Yang-Gangers. Had never heard of the Pirate Party. Wasn’t sure there was even a College Republicans Chapter on campus.
Early afternoon, the temperature a pleasant 52 degrees, we went for a walk around campus looking for a good public place to Skype with Eloise and Susie back in Boulder, Montana. Max had been back in touch with Eloise on a regular basis the past week and reported that she was a nervous wreck at night, but gaining confidence with every class she taught. Student after student was reporting that his or her parents were voting for Eloise, saying things like “I told them you are the best teacher ever – you make learning fun – and you’d be the best school board member ever because you’d set a high standard for what it takes to become a tenured teacher.”
“Pretty astute stuff for high-schoolers,” Rocky said. “They must be drop-out material.”
About 4 p.m., we settled on the architecturally beautiful student center, straight out of Colonial Williamsburg, with a tree-lined path to the street where we had the Land Yacht parked. We painted a new sign “We’re The Rumpkins – Out Harnessing the Spirit of Imagination,” and a second sign, “Watch the election with us.”
Moments after parking, the school security patrol showed up and asked if we had a permit. Steve told him about our first hours in Norman, got out his recently printed copy of the “Ten Amendments”, and spoke like this, “Like the good judge said’th, thou shant deny the Citizens their right to peaceably assemble – or risk damnation.”
After hearing us out, the campus cop went back to his golf cart, and came back with a permit slip for us to fill out, saying “I got the authority to sign off on this – good luck to you guys. God speed, you can hold off Trump winning again.”
At 6 p.m., Susie, skyping from Boulder, reported that it looked like a heavy turn-out, “These kids are so great – they’ve been going door-to-door since school let out. On one street there was even a parade of people heading to the polls! Our cowboy friends were driving around town in their pick-ups with bull horns blaring to get out and vote for Eloise.”
At 7 p.m., Susie reported the first volunteers were starting to arrive at election night headquarters . . . “here at the Chat & Chew, and Eloise is home writing two speeches, one in case she wins, and the other – don’t even think about it – she’s going to win!”
At 8 p.m., we were skyping with Gregory, that volunteer of Eloise’s who had come to San Francisco with her for our hootenanny, “Hey, you guys got any more Hoots planned?” He said he’d get back to us as soon as the results started coming in, “We’ve got runners at every polling place with instructions to race over as soon as the vote is tallied, and we’ve got a big chalk board set up.” A few minutes later, we could hear cheers go up and assumed the first runner had arrived with good results.
By now Robin, the Professor, had joined us saying, “Ya know, you guys make me feel like I need to start voting again, last time it was McGovern, next time it will be Pirate Jack – you’re running, right Pirate?” And we actually had a throng of students starting to gather, sipping beverages Skip had raced out to buy.
At exactly 8:47 p.m. Mountain Time (according to Patty who had the time running with the live video she was taking), Gregory came back on the screen and screamed, “She won! She won! We’ve got a winner. All the results are in – it was a land slide! Let me see if I can turn this to Eloise– she’s starting to give her victory speech.” Here it is captured verbatim by Patty:
“I am so happy I am going to hug all of you! Thanks so much! Thanks to each and every one of you. Thanks to the voters for their confidence in us.
“We won because we had the most volunteers, not the most money, the most volunteers.
“We won because we got our message out there, each of you going person to person, one at a time.
“We won because we were different, not running as a Democrat or a Republican.
“We won because we had the BEST message – one that all of you helped create:
First, hire the best teachers, and we’ll have the best schools;
Second, include parents in deciding which teachers should get tenure;
Third, have grade-schoolers help teach pre-schoolers;
Fourth, pay high-schoolers to tutor grade-schoolers;
Fifth, reduce the size of administration and use the savings for a college scholarship fund.
“Really we won because we created the most excitement. We made this fun. We were optimistic. We were smiling. We were enthusiastic. We had a positive message.
“We won because we earned the trust of the voters that we meant what we said, and we’d do our best to get it done.
“Before I end, I want to say we’re part of a larger world out there, and this is just the beginning. We can win any election, anytime, anywhere using our simple formula:
One, reach out to everybody;
Two, get outside the two-party box;
Three, appeal to peoples’ better instincts;
Create hope, not fear: WE CAN DO THIS!
“Finally, something my father taught me: Be Sincere; Be Brief; Be Seated! Who wants the first hug!”
And guess what? Everybody by the Land Yacht started clapping too, including the dozen or so students who said, “Where do we sign-up?